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This week we introduce one of our favourite Northerners – the very funny and very lovely Gemma from ColleysWobbles, who shot to fame a year or so ago because of her boobs – or rather what she did with them before telling the world!
However, it’s her wonderful blog, full of great writing and awesome pictures that has kept everyone coming back for more! So sit back, relax and enjoy our little getting to know you session! It’s been a little while in the making, but it’s well worth the wait. What’s 6 months between friends anyway 😜
And if you fancy taking part yourself then give us a shout, as there are loads of great benefits in doing so. Admittedly none of them immediately spring to mind but I’m sure there’s loads. Trust me, I’m a civil servant.
1.Tell us about yourself in 20 words or less:
Thirty something creative Yorkshire lass riding the wave that is life with her two boys and very tolerant husband.
2. How would your child(ren) describe you?
She’s a bit naggy, and always says stuff like “Stop picking your bum”; “Put the cushions back on the sofa”; and “No more biscuits”. On the flip side she’s also quite wise, one of her pearls of wisdom is to never trust a fart. She’s good at cuddles and tickling too.
3. When and why did you last properly laugh out loud?
I recently went on holiday with all of my boys to Paguera in Majorca. So whilst Mr Wobbles was splashing about in the pool with the boys I read Matt Coyne’s (aka Man vs Baby) book Dummy. I was chuckling away like an dolphin on laughing gas. Suffice to say I got a few odd looks. One of my particular favourites was when Matt detailed the time he and a man called Jeremy had to practice doing a nappy change on a pretend doll, suffice to say it didn’t go well. Hilarious and well worth the read.
4. Do you try to be funny when you are writing? Tell us a bit about your blogging ‘process’.
Most of my posts have a level of humour in them because I love to make people laugh. Laughter is the best medicine after all. Although I do occasionally write thought provoking and heartfelt pieces when the moment grabs me. I love to write the occasional parody especially based on Disney songs (see Nowt’ Like a Tea and Beauty in to Beast). Process wise I think of a good topic, then give it a title, stare at my computer for about an hour, pour a glass of wine (I find it helps the creative flow), write a few sentences, read them over and over, draw a picture, write a little bit more, yawn, go to bed and return to it when life allows (usually when the kids have gone to bed and the rubble from the child tornado has been tidied). I’m a self confessed blog sloth. I find it hard to pump stuff out quickly, it takes a lot of time before I’m happy to hit the publish button because I want to make sure it’s just right. I bet you wish you’d never asked.
5. What is the funniest thing you’ve read in the past few months?
As mentioned before Dummy is so so funny and well worth a purchase.
I also love love love my amazing friend Dawn from Rhyming with Wine’s posts. She writes some absolute pearlers. I loved her most recent post The Supermarket Incident all about a trip or should that be a slip to the supermarket? Very relatable, hilarious and she’s a lot like Julia Donaldson. A perfect mix. We’ve also written a kids book together, keep your eyes out for that one.
6. What are the best and worst things about becoming a parent?
* Creating a lovely little person who is a mix of you and your better half
* Seeing their faces light up when they’re happy/excited
* Watching them grow and develop individual personalities
* Kids are hilarious
* It’s the best thing ever
* Poo lots of poo
* Whinging lots of whinging
* Questions lots of questions
* Refusal to eat out of a bowl or cup purely based on its colour
* Constantly been followed whilst hearing a repetition of “What can I have now?”
* Rarely having personal space
* It’s the most frustrating thing ever
7. Do your friends/family find you funny in ‘real life’?
I’m never sure if people are laughing with me or at me. Like anyone, I have my moments of hilarity and moments of stupidity but more of the latter.
8. Go on, say something funny!
I once collapsed because I ate a piece of lasagna that was too hot. Coincidentally at the time my dad was telling me and my mum about someone who had unfortunately keeled over and died very suddenly. It was apparently the longest 2 minutes of their life and they thought I’d essentially done the same. Clearly I was fine, all I remember is waking up with my dad attempting to do the Heimlich manoeuvre on me. I was non the wiser. I’m a tad more conscious about eating hot food these days.
9. How did you get into writing and why?
I once made a total boob of myself (but mostly my son who at the time was a baby). As a result I posted a picture onto The Unmumsy Mum’s Facebook page as a light hearted and humorous warning thinking only a few people would see it, it got 182k likes, 54.1k shares and is still been shared on social media today. It was an absolute whirlwind and along with it came a lot of keyboard warriors, trolls and ill informed articles. I’d always enjoyed writing and as a lot of people had made automatic assumptions about me, my parenting and had also got a lot of their facts wrong I thought it was about time I wrote my side of the story. So ColleysWobbles began with Nobody’s Perfect. I got the bug for blogging and have been going for nearly two years and I love it.
10. If you could only have one meal every day for the rest of your life, what would you choose?
Anything Thai/Malaysian/Chinese with rice noodles. I love oodles of noodles.
11. Complete the sentence; ‘Since having a child…’
I’ve often wondered how teachers and teaching assistants with their own kids manage to do their job. They spend each and every day / hour with children. There is literally no escape from the whinging, poo talk, and loudness. You guys are heroes that need a serious break, and wine, lots of wine.
12. In your opinion, what is the worst children’s TV show, and why?
Show Me Show Me. Firstly once I hear the theme tune I cannot get it out of my head for at least 48 hours (serious ear worm); secondly whilst I’m sure Poi is a lovely lady, she irritates the baps off me, especially when she does “E I E I aye up” or when she’s playing Momo (It makes me want to rip my ears off); thirdly it makes me feel a tad awkward. Two grown adults pretending to be three year olds playing with dolls and teddies. Weird.
13. Please tell us about your blog and why we should visit:
It’s a magical mystery tour of my mind with a myriad of pictures. A variation of posts about wobbles with life, parenting, and the occasional Disney parody. It’d be reet grand if you had a look and liked / shared any posts that tickle your funnies. My mission is to make people smile and laugh and by golly do we need it at the moment.
Well that was another good one wasn’t it? This series really has become the who’s who of comedy parenting bloggers in my humble opinion. Hopefully there will be another one next week, but that kind of relies on people volunteering to take part! So if you fancy answering these very questions yourself, and consider yourself at least a teeny tiny bit funny then drop us a line! We’d LOVE to have you.
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