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In The Night Garden ‘Actually Complete Arse’ Admits Toddler

We spoke to a toddler from Reading named Joshua about popular TV series In The Night Garden to get his views on just why it is so loved by miniature people. His answers may surprise you:

So Joshua, when did you first watch In The Night Garden?

It was a long time ago. I think I was one. I’m two now. It just came on the TV upstairs one day and I thought it seemed OK.

What did you think about it?

The plot was quite easy to follow and the words were easy to learn. I liked Upsy Daisy’s hair too. It lacked the humour and social commentary of Peppa Pig or Ben & Holly, but it was OK to pass the time. I also thought it was fun because it made my dad cross when I watched it. He said it was beneath me and that I needed to take a long hard look at myself.

How often do you watch In The Night Garden?

It comes on every day just before I go to bed. I watch a few minutes and then stroll off leaving mum and dad to watch it whilst I climb and fall off things like an unemployed miniature stuntman.

Do you still enjoy In The Night Garden?

I’m a bit disappointed with the lack of character development to be honest. Each of the main protagonists still just repeatedly says their own name. My dad still hates it so I still pretend to enjoy it so he has to watch it every day. If I’m being honest though, it’s a bit pony, even for CBeebies. If it doesn’t have talking animals in it I lose interest pretty quickly.

Will you continue to watch In The Night Garden?

To be fair I’ve only been watching it to annoy my dad and for the look of disappointment on his face each day. But it’s becoming increasingly difficult to feign interest. If I have to sit through another twenty minutes of the bloody Tombliboos I might actually scream. Even more than usual.

Is it your favourite TV programme?

As if!! I like Peppa Pig because of the muddy puddles, Ben & Holly because Nanny Plum is funny and Paw Patrol because I like dogs.

So there you have it. Toddlers pretend to enjoy In The Night Garden just to piss off their parents.

Next week: Dora – Lovable multilingual heroine or Satanic cow-eyed devil woman? A toddler’s view.

If this post had inspired you to check out my thoughts on other popular toddler TV shows have a look here!

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